One more month

Well word is in.....we got cut again. They only matched up to April 15th. Referrals are suppose to be sent out at the beginning of next week. That is the only good news I heard so far. (The referrals have been sent about every 5 weeks and this time it is less than 4 weeks). I thought I was prepared for this, protected my heart and all, but I guess that wasn't true. I had an appointment to get my nails done today and when I sat down, Dawn looked at me and said "Why do you look so sad?" To which I replied "Whaaaa whaaa!" Yep, I started bawling. How embarrassing. I am such a dork! The thought of waiting one more month isn't too bad because it is December and because of the holidays will go quickly-what is bad is that I am still 3 months now from holding my little one. Instead of traveling in December we will probably travel in March. ARGH!!! I am going to take 1-2 days to cry, scream and throw things and then I will move on to positive thoughts.

Well, I can now say I am 99% positive we will be in the next batch. We technically only missed the cut off by 2 days (the 16 & 17th were weekend days). SO-around the first part of January we will get to see the face of the newest Stahley member and I will get to start packing and planning.

I just read a post from another mom-to-be in the same situation that we are in and I totally agree with her. I need to picture God asking me "Do you trust me?" And then I need to completely and totally trust him and his plan and get off my high horse.